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Border Bushes

9/15/2017

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Well, since I can't put my most serious essays on my website, because I have to revise some and try to get them published, I figured I could show my sassy, possibly sarcastic, Buffa side. Up at 3:30 am, and thought, "Why don't we plant a towering border hedge or a border forest? Isn't the wall now going to be a fence, anyway?" Plant thick, thorny, hedges to give landscapers jobs. I'd be a Part-time trimmer. Actually, miles of hedges would need Full-time trimmers. If anybody set a part of it on fire to get through the hedges, we'd see the smoke, go right to the spot and catch 'em. If they try to poke through the hedges, when they pop out, we'd see 'em, like a deer coming out of the woods into a clearing. I suppose they could take their guns and shoot through the hedges at the trimmers. Ain't there some sort of infrared instruments we can use to spot a person getting close to the other side of the hedge? Maybe, if the hedge was wide and thick enough, the bullets would be slowed down by the hedge. 3:30 am, taking care of borders.

After I thought about a border hedge to replace a border wall or fence, I went looking for hedge pictures to make my case, and voila, see what I found.

Let's create a maze of hedges to slow 'em down. But how to maintain the maze without being attacked by someone trying to get to the other side? I'd have my landscaping trimmer sheers with me as a weapon. A patrol helicopter would have to follow me and my team of trimmers from above, maybe.

They can trim on their side. That's fine. As soon as they'd cut straight through, they'd be like that deer popping into the clearing. We could have rows of hedges; they'd quit trimming to get to the other side after a while: wall of hedge, followed by another wall of hedge, followed by another wall of hedge, and then a good old-fashioned row of "Kiss my border buns." If America is offensive enough, maybe nobody will want to cross the border, anyway, and maybe Mexico will plant their own hedge wall. The debate tactics of President Trump overflow into foreign policy. What are the good solutions to America's problems?


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    Essay Itches:
    This is not a typical blog. I might write about an itch I have over the news or from a floating idea in my mind.

     

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